Horrorscopes

Back in TLB20 we published a series of ‘horrorscopes’ – reworked daily horoscopes that, because of their adjustments, perhaps better reflect actual life.

Here is what one of the creators, Matthew Carroll, had to say about it at the time (he worked with Stephen Pham on these artistic marvels):

Working in a market research call centre places certain restrictions on your autonomy.

You can’t hold any conversation with co-workers for more than ten seconds before someone picks up a ringing phone however many kilometres away, and invariably asks if you’re aware it’s dinner time (it’s always dinner time, somewhere).

Faced with nothing but the company’s allowance of MX’s puzzle page, I became transfixed on the horoscope section while phrases like, “which brand” and “on a scale of one to ten” fell from my mouth into the receiver. I picked up the pen and defaced a Gemini first.

There I discovered the joy in taking the often hopeful, vague, and reaffirming tone of the average horoscope, and corrupting them into something ominous, sardonic, and mostly nonsensical.

Bringing home my scribbles like a kindergarten kid who can’t wait to show their best drawings from play time, soon enough my housemate Stephen Pham and I jokingly started sharing our collective efforts on a Tumblr.

We’ve been blessed with many ‘successes’ from this venture, which we’ve summarised below with our reactions:

  • A level of engagement and reach eclipsing anything else we’ve ever done (astonishment and delight [later replaced by frustration])
  • Unwittingly interacting with Homestuck and Night Vale fandoms (confusion followed by sweating profusely in anger)
  • Rumblings of a book deal from the agent that got Shit My Dad Says published (surprise/exaltation/apathy)
  • Featured on BuzzFeed (bitter; quickly fading laughter)

Enjoy!

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