So at this point I was in my second year of university. The campus I attended was a random mash-up of various architectural eras, with a sense of geometry exclusive to itself.
I would wander around in my downtime thinking up ideas… amazing, presumably game-changing ideas that I would later forget.
What I was studying and where it was leading me wasn’t exactly clear. Some subjects operated like dazzling prism, giving me a new perspective on everything. Others were like, barf, whatever.
At times, the images in the slideshow presentations seemed so personal I thought I must be hallucinating them. I was glad it was dark because I couldn’t control my facial expressions… sometimes I’d even drool.
At one lecture, Professor Candy-Strapps must notice I’m acting weird and he asks to talk to me in his office. He tactfully tries to discuss my potential, my tendency to vagueness, how things harden as you grow-up… my mind starts to wander…
I find myself in a familiar daydream where I’m walking a grand hall, attending some sort of expo or bazaar. The exhibit consists of hundreds of these dioramas, each revealing a life I could lead.
My faves include: “solo yachts-woman”, “the bohemian family” and “shopping centre owner/designer”. This gets me thinking about this one Sylvia Plath quote about wanting to live every kind of life… then, I don’t know if it’s separate or part of the same thing, but she has this bit about how wanting everything is dangerously close to wanting nothing… oh god.
This stays with me ‘til the weekend and I’m drunk at a party trying to explain it to some randoms. They don’t really get it.
But it’s ok ‘cause now I’m really drunk and Ishka’s there and the Eurthymics start playing and we dance with wild abandon that’s kind of put-on and kind of real.
Michael Hawkins is a Melbourne-dwelling comic book and visual artist of Tasmanian and U.S. derivation. He believes in mystery.
Keep an eye out for more instalments from 'Ursula’ in the near future. While you’re waiting, grab a copy of The Lifted Brow #19 to see more of Michael’s work.